I can't sleep.

People come and go in your life for all different reasons.

You'll have youre heart broken & you'll break someone elses heart, c'est lavie.

Be thankful for what you have. because you never know what you have till its gone.

I don't regret any mistakes or decisions I have made. because if I didn't make them, I wouldnt be where I am at today.

I'm happy with life & although it took a long time for me to finally say that, I wouldn't change it for anything..

Today when I came home from registering for my classes, Dylan came up to me & hugged me & said, "Mama!"

In that instant, my heart melted & I knew this is where I needed to be.

I cherish every laugh; every giggle; every storytime; every bath; every word & everything he pretty much does because soon enough he is going to grow up & he won't need me as much anymore.

Never take someone for granted, hold every person close to your heart because you might wake up one day & realize that you've lost a diamond while you were too busy collecting stones.

Labor and Delivery Story.

I am sitting here thinking of the day my sweet baby was born. I will never forget it, not ever.

February 14 was hectic for Jason and I, it was our 3 year anniversary & I had to go to the Emergency Room because I was having contractions & they kept coming & getting worse. The Dr. did an internal on me & promised me that Dylan wasn't ready to be born. I stayed for a few hours so they could monitor me & than after they observed me & confirmed I wasn't going into labor Jason & I went home.

Several hours after we arrived home from the hospital I was having horrible stomach pains. I concluded that they were just Braxton Hicks & laid down & eventually fell asleep.

Early on the morning of the 15th I woke up having to pee really bad. As soon as I got up, my water broke. I was so unprepared. I hadn't even packed my overnight bag for the hospital yet cause my due date was February 22nd. I was nervous. I woke Jason up & sat on the toilet for what seemed like forever while he called my parents, my Doctor. & everyone else. He frantically packed a bag of my things & out the door we went.

Thankfully Jason's car has leather seats, my water didn't stop leaking till about an hour after we got to the hospital. Because my water broke on it's own I had to deliver within 24 hours of it breaking or else the baby & I would be at serious risk for infection.

I was admitted immediately & my doctor confirmed that I was 1 cmm dilated.

By than the pain was severe & I wanted an epidural but my doctor assured me that I was not allowed to have one till I was 5 cmms.

I was given Pitocin to speed up my labor & Stadol for the pain.

4 hours passed & I was getting antsy. The pain was still existent and even though I was 3cmms dilated, my doctor said I could have an epidural.

After receiving one I wish I never would of asked for one. It only numbed the left side of my body & it was pointless so after a few hours it was removed.

I am going to make a long story short & say that I was in labor for 22 hours, most of that time I was without an epidural & all natural. At the 21st hour I was in labor my doctor decided that it would be best if I was to have an emergency c-section because I was STILL only 3cmms dilated. I felt like fainting because I was so nervous. They tried a spinal block on me but once again it didn't work. So the only choice was to be put under. How scared I was. I had only been put to sleep once before when I had my tonsils out & now here I am facing the fact that it needed to be done again. Jason wasn't allowed in the Operating Room but my Dr. said he could stay long enough to cut the cord & after that he had to leave.

The only thing I remember before my c-section was counting to 3 & waking up in my recovery room. I'm kind of sad that I didn't get to hold Dylan right after he was born, rather than 5 hours later when I woke up.

I wouldn't change anything though. Everything happened the way it happened for a reason & I am so blessed to be Dylan's mom.

He is such an amazing child & I am so proud.

It's not even 6pm yet.

So, I have made the choice to go back to college & obtain my degree in Radiography. I have been on the phone with Financial Aid and my advisors for the past two hours. Dylan is napping and Jason is cooking dinner and I have a free minute to myself.

Naturally I gravitated towards here to check my Facebook & emails, among other things. I found myself wanting to start another blog.

I can't remember my other login information for my old blogs so I figured I would start a new one.

A fresh new blog talking about anything & everything.

If given the opportunity, I can talk about pretty much anything. I love talking and writing. It's therapeutic to me, and as Dylan is getting older it's nice to know that I'm not the only parent who's child colored all over the walls.

Which brings me to the reason why I started this blog, I remember it like it was yesterday, probably because it was. Dylan was in the office with his father and I was in the kitchen doing dishes. I heard scuffling in the hallway and I noticed Dylan somehow made his way there, what I did not know was that he had a crayon in his hand. I proceeded to walk towards him and than suddenly I saw him quickly move his hand across the wall. I didn't have my glasses on so I couldn't see what he was doing. Upon my arrival in the hallway I noticed red lines all over the walls. I wasn't mad at all , I thought it was very cute until I tried scrubbing it off lol Needless to say the walls didn't come clean with just bleach and a rag. Thank you Mr. Clean for magic erasers. They are so handy for things like that. I don't even know where he got the crayon from, I put them in the top shelf of his closet and he is only 16 months so he couldn't of reached them.

Still, it was cute that he decided to color a picture on the wall but that will be his only picture he colors on the wall, and if not, there is always more magic erasers.